Anger | Dr. Margaret Paul

Anger And Other Forms of Control

By Margaret, on February 9th, 2015

If you grew up in a family where one or both parents used anger to control you, then anger likely plays a role in your life now.

Did you grow up with anger in your household? Did one or both of your parents use anger as a way to keep you in line . . . → Read More: Anger And Other Forms of Control

When To Compromise…And When Not To Compromise

By Margaret, on December 1st, 2014

Discover when compromise is healthy and when it’s self-abandoning.

Compromise! What does this word conjure up for you? Is it is a positive or negative word for you? Does it bring up a sense of loving resolution, or a sense of losing yourself and losing your integrity?

When you think about compromising, what are . . . → Read More: When To Compromise…And When Not To Compromise

How Not To Have A Wonderful Celebration

By Margaret, on September 28th, 2014

The control-resist system guarantees you won’t have a wonderful anything.

Adriann and Chandler are a sweet, successful couple in their early thirties. In spite of loving each other deeply, they often find themselves in conflict over seemingly minor issues, as most couples do. Recently, just one week before their 4th anniversary, they had a . . . → Read More: How Not To Have A Wonderful Celebration

Why Racism?

By Margaret, on September 2nd, 2014

Discover some of the underlying causes of racism and what is necessary to heal this scourge of our society.

I do not pretend to be an expert on what causes a person to be a racist, but I would like to explore some ideas based on the principles of Inner Bonding.

Those of you . . . → Read More: Why Racism?

Do You Remember What You Say When You are Enraged?

By Margaret, on July 28th, 2014

Discover why any kind of engaging when someone is angry is a waste of energy.

“Rage can…shut off the hippocampus [linked to memory], and people with out-of-control anger may not be lying when they say they don’t recall what they said or did in that altered state of mind.” Mindsight, P.155 Daniel Siegel, M.D.

Have . . . → Read More: Do You Remember What You Say When You are Enraged?

Are You Hard On Yourself? 9 Reasons to Love Yourself Instead

By Margaret, on January 23rd, 2014

If you are hard on yourself, do you believe that this is helpful to you? You might want to re-evaluate this false belief.

Are you hard on yourself? Do you think this is a good thing? Do you believe this motivates you to do better? Think again. If you are doing well, it’s likely in spite of being hard on yourself, not because of it.

Many of us grew up with parents and teachers who believed that being hard on us was the way to motivate us. As children, we absorbed their judgments of us and became strict taskmasters with ourselves.

Are you aware of the negative consequences of being hard on yourself? Continue reading Are You Hard On Yourself? 9 Reasons to Love Yourself Instead