How often have you shared your feelings and the other person became angry and defensive?
How often have you heard that it’s good to “share your feelings”? How often have you shared your feelings and it backfired on you? Perhaps you find yourself saying “But I’m just sharing my feelings!”
The problem is that . . . → Read More: When It’s Loving To Share Your Feelings…And When It’s Not
Discover why any kind of engaging when someone is angry is a waste of energy.
“Rage can…shut off the hippocampus [linked to memory], and people with out-of-control anger may not be lying when they say they don’t recall what they said or did in that altered state of mind.” Mindsight, P.155 Daniel Siegel, M.D.
Have . . . → Read More: Do You Remember What You Say When You are Enraged?
Do you have the expectation that you will receive unconditional love from a partner?
Most of us would love the experience of being loved unconditionally by someone. This is the experience we needed when we were growing up, but most parents are not connected enough with themselves and their spiritual guidance to be able . . . → Read More: Is Unconditional Love Realistic?
How are you limiting yourself to limit your partner? What are the consequences of this?
“As long as you keep a person down, some part of you has to be down there to hold him down, so it means you cannot soar as you otherwise might.” ~Marian Anderson 1902-1993, Concert and Opera Singer
“I’ve . . . → Read More: How Controlling Others Controls You
Many people confuse boundaries – which are a way of taking loving care of yourself – with controlling behavior toward others.
Marilee told me in one of our early phone sessions: “I set a boundary. I told him that he couldn’t speak to me that way any more.”
Jackson said to me in one of our early Skype sessions: “I earn the money. My girlfriend doesn’t work, but loves to spend the money I earn. So I set a boundary. I told her that she had to stop spending so much money and racking up credit card bills.”
Both of these people are confused about what a boundary is. They think a boundary is something they set for someone else, but they are wrong.
A boundary is something you set for yourself. Continue reading Are You Confused About Boundaries in Relationships?