If you are hard on yourself, do you believe that this is helpful to you? You might want to re-evaluate this false belief.
Are you hard on yourself? Do you think this is a good thing? Do you believe this motivates you to do better? Think again. If you are doing well, it’s likely in spite of being hard on yourself, not because of it.
Many of us grew up with parents and teachers who believed that being hard on us was the way to motivate us. As children, we absorbed their judgments of us and became strict taskmasters with ourselves.
Are you aware of the negative consequences of being hard on yourself? Continue reading Are You Hard On Yourself? 9 Reasons to Love Yourself Instead
Discover the major cause of relationship failure and what to do about it.
Most people, when asked if they want a loving relationship, will say that having a loving relationship is one of the two most important things to them – along with having work they love.
Why, then, do so many relationships fail?
If we want to go deeply into why relationships fail, we need to go all the way back to the parental relationship. Continue reading Why Relationships Fail
Are you aware of the feelings you cause yourself when you attempt to control others rather than love yourself?
“I have never been able to conceive how any rational being could propose happiness to himself from the exercise of power over others.” - Thomas Jefferson
When your intent is to control others, are you . . . → Read More: Does Controlling Others Make You Feel Happy?
Is sex mostly gone out of your relationship? There are always good reasons for this.
Do you identify with Lawrence, whose wife won’t have sex with him? In my work with individuals and couples, I often hear this complaint. Lawrence asks:
“Would you please address how one deals with the anger, frustration, hurt, etc., . . . → Read More: “My Wife Won’t Have Sex With Me “
Are you ready to discover the way to happiness? Are you ready to discover what Epictetus knew over 2000 years ago?
“There is only one way to happiness and that is to cease worrying about things which are beyond the power of our will.” ~Epictetus, AD 55-135
It’s hard for me to imagine that . . . → Read More: The Way to Happiness
“The art of living lies not in eliminating but in growing with troubles.” ~ Bernard M. Baruch
“How can I get this pain to go away?”
This is often what clients who seek my help ask me in a first session. Because they have never learned to manage and learn from their pain, they want to avoid it, eliminate it – find a way to hide from it.
The problem is that they have been unsuccessfully hiding from their pain for years by abandoning themselves – by staying focused in their head rather than their body, hoping that if they avoid feeling their feelings, the feelings will go away. They have been judging their feelings and turning to various addictions for the same reason.
When trouble comes, which it inevitably does, they intensify their avoidance of their feelings. Continue reading Are You Hiding?