Are You An Energy Vampire Or With An Energy Vampire?


By Dr. Margaret Paul June 22, 2020

Do you suck the life out of others, trying to get the love you need, or do you allow others to suck the life out of you?

Another phrase for ‘squid’ is ‘energy vampire.’  “Squid is my word for people who seem to be missing . . . → Read More: Are You An Energy Vampire Or With An Energy Vampire?

Are You Emotionally Dependent?

Discover the difference between needs coming from emotional dependency and authentic needs that we have within a relationship.

Every few weeks I do a free webinar. People can listen on their computers or on the phone; they can write in asking questions or they can ask me directly on the phone. Here is one of the questions a woman – I will call her Susan – asked in a webinar on emotional dependency:

“When we are in a relationship and we have made our needs clear to our partner, is hanging on in the hope they will follow through with promises to meet our needs a sign of emotional dependency?”

The answer is – it depends on what needs you are taking about. There are some needs we have that can only be met by another person, and there are other needs that we need to learn to meet ourselves. Continue reading Are You Emotionally Dependent?


Are You Abandoning Yourself?

Do you believe that feelings of abandonment are coming from others abandoning you – or do they come from self-abandonment?

When we think about abandonment, we generally think about being left by someone. But abandonment is about leaving someone we are responsible for – a child or an old or sick person who cannot take care of themselves and whom we have agreed to take care of.

As a healthy adult, another adult can leave you, but they cannot abandon you, since they likely have not agreed to be responsible for you.

It might seem strange to you, but, as a healthy adult, when you feel abandoned by someone, it is not actually about them. It is about having abandoned yourself.

Most people don’t think about how they abandon themselves because they don’t recognize that they are responsible for themselves – physically, emotionally, spiritually, financially, relationally and organizationally. Continue reading Are You Abandoning Yourself?


A Problem with Today’s Parenting

Many parents try to be far better parents than their parents were, yet their children grow up feeling lost and empty. Discover why in this article.

There was an interesting article in The Atlantic, entitled “How to Land Your Kid in Therapy: Why the obsession with our kids’ happiness may be dooming them to unhappy adulthoods. A therapist and mother reports.”

Feeling lost

The article is about the way many parents focus much of their energy on being there for their children, but their children end up feeling lost and empty. Continue reading A Problem with Today’s Parenting


Relationships: Attract at Your Common Level of Self-Love

Learn to attract people at your common level of self-love, rather than at your common level of self-abandonment. . . . → Read More: Relationships: Attract at Your Common Level of Self-Love

Life’s One achievable Goal

We all have many goals in life, and we may achieve some of them and not others. But there is one primary goal that is not only achievable, but is the very reason you are here on the planet. . . . → Read More: Life’s One achievable Goal