Merilee wrote the following question to me in one of my relationship webinars:
“Hi Dr. Paul — One of my biggest struggles is being open to giving and receiving love, but also setting boundaries. I want to be loving, not controlling, but I don’t want people to say or treat me in ways that I don’t like. How to reconcile?”
Merilee, of course you don’t want people to treat you in ways that you don’t like. Who would want that? It’s painful when people treat us in unloving ways.
However, the real issue is to come to terms with what you can and can’t control. I get the feeling from your question that, while you don’t want to be controlling, you believe that setting boundaries gives you control over whether or not others treat you in ways you don’t like. Continue reading The Art of Setting Boundaries
Learn what you can do when you don’t feel appreciated by your partner.
Chris wrote this question for one of my relationship webinars:
“What do you do when you feel you are not loved for who you are? How do you accept your relationship when you don’t feel appreciated, or you think it’s your fault for what happens in your life? How can you change your relationship? How can you make it better?”
There are two ways of dealing with this issue.
Explore Within
Are you appreciating yourself? If you are judging yourself and telling yourself that ‘it’s your fault’ for what happens in your life, then it sounds like you are not seeing or appreciating yourself. Frequently, others treat us the way we treat ourselves. Do you like yourself? Do you love yourself? Do you value yourself? These are the kinds of questions you need to ask yourself. Continue reading “I’m Not Appreciated”
Are you seeking the formula for attracting the partner of your dreams? Here it is!
Rochelle asks:
“If I assess myself quite objectively, if I know my accomplishments as well as my drawbacks, is there a chance to be loved by a worthy solid and wholesome man – the one I feel I`d be happy with? By the one who is objectively stronger and wiser and kinder? `Cause it seems to me that I`m not worthy of him, because I know really bad sides of myself such as envy, unhealthy jealousy, pride, cowardice… And I am still trying to do away with them and do not know how much time it will take to get rid of them for it is a life-time process.”
Rochelle, in order to find the man of your dreams, you need to become the person you are seeking – the strong, wise and kind person you want to partner with. We all have positive and negative qualities, because we all have an incredibly wonderful essence as well as a wounded ego self. Continue reading Finding The Partner Of My Dreams
Do you sometimes feel like you try to give your partner the connection he or she wants and can’t figure out how?
I was having a Skype session with Andrea and Lawrence. Married for 18 years with two teen-age children, their marriage was strained. When I asked Lawrence how things were going between them, his answer was the same as always: “Fine.” When I asked Andrea the same question, she got a pained look on her face. “Things are okay, but not great. I’m lonely with Lawrence so much of the time. We just can’t seem to connect.”
Have you ever wondered how you can make a difference on the planet? Watching this 1 minute movie, “Make A Difference!,” will help you discover how you can make a difference to others each day.
Margaret Paul, Ph.D. is a best-selling author of 8 books, relationship expert, and co-creator of the powerful Inner . . . → Read More: Inspirational Video: Make A Difference
Are you stuck in your relationship not being able to talk about sex, or getting into power struggles about sex?
Sean wrote in the following question on one of my free webinars about sexuality:
“My wife and I have been married now for eighteen years and for the most part are still very happy together. A year or so ago a friend introduced us to Inner Bonding and both together and alone we have become familiar with the Six Steps. My question for you this evening is, what suggestions do have to help us communicate our sexual needs and desires without so much defensiveness and judgments? Our wounded selves have a powerful dynamic in these regards so fear, of course, enters in with its control/protect mode. And so the dance continues…” Continue reading How to Talk about Sex
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