Discover the difference between needs coming from emotional dependency and authentic needs that we have within a relationship.
Every few weeks I do a free webinar. People can listen on their computers or on the phone; they can write in asking questions or they can ask me directly on the phone. Here is one of the questions a woman – I will call her Susan – asked in a webinar on emotional dependency:
“When we are in a relationship and we have made our needs clear to our partner, is hanging on in the hope they will follow through with promises to meet our needs a sign of emotional dependency?”
The answer is – it depends on whatneeds you are taking about. There are some needs we have that can only be met by another person, and there are other needs that we need to learn to meet ourselves. Continue reading Are You Emotionally Dependent?
Are you in a relationship with a man who is not sexual? You are not alone!
In a question to me on one of my webinars, Melanie writes: “My husband is very loving, but not very sexual. I’ve tried to talk to him about this many times in non-threatening ways, but his lack of enthusiasm toward sex makes it very difficult to engage myself when he finally does get around to feeling sexual. We have zero intimacy mentally and very little physically.”
We often hear of men complaining that their wives are not sexual. It might surprise you that I often hear this complaint from women as well. Continue reading “My Husband is Not Sexual”
Are you a woman who rarely or never thinks about sex? Have you believed that was something wrong with you?
Laverne wrote the following to me:
“I have never had thoughts that picture me making love with my husband – or anyone else for that matter. I imagine connection, fun and feelings of love but never making love. If it was left up to me sex would never be on the agenda, just because it would never occur to me to make love. I know when my husband would like to make love, and I enjoy it when I do make love, but it would never cross my mind if he didn’t initiate. I feel I am missing being aware and connected to a part of me. Surely a reasonably balanced and mostly connected human being should have some sort of sex drive. Your thoughts and insights would be really appreciated. Thank you.” Continue reading Why Many Women Don’t Think About Sex
Is your partner’s messiness driving you crazy? Discover how to resolve this issue in your relationship.
When we meet and fall in love with someone, we often don’t think about what might seem like minor differences, which can later turn into major conflicts. One of these differences that frequently occurs with my clients is neatness vs. messiness.
Vanessa, in one of our Skype sessions, said:
“I’m a naturally neat person and my husband, Derek, is very messy. I’m constantly picking up after him and I hate it. I’ve talked to him about it, letting him know that neatness is very important to me and that I feel crabby and overwhelmed when things are messy, but nothing changes. It makes me feel very uncared about, and I don’t know what to do.” Continue reading I’m Neat, He’s Messy–What Can I Do?
Do you get into fights that turn ugly as the conflict escalates? Discover how to stop doing this.
A participant in one of my webinars asked: “Is there any way to resolve conflict if you have two ‘escalating’ personalities trying to solve a problem? In other words, how do you resolve conflict between two very strong willed, always-right personalities, who tend to escalate with every attempt at solving conflict?”
There is a hard and fast rule about resolving conflict that most people find hard to remember: You cannot resolve conflict unless both people are open to learning.
As long as each person is trying to be right, win, or at least not lose, no new learning can take place. Conflict resolves when new learning occurs due to both people being open tolearning about themselves and each other. Continue reading Stop Escalating Conflict!
Discover why you might be obsessing about an ex and how to stop.
“How do I stop allowing my ex to consume my thoughts?” asks Tammy.
“Is your ex consuming your thoughts, or are you consumed with your ex?” I ask.
“What’s the difference?” Tammy asks.
“The difference is that you are asking the question in such as way as to indicate that your ex is doing something, i.e. somehow consuming your thoughts. But is your ex really doing something, or are you choosing to be consumed with thoughts of your ex?”
Comments are closed 
Listen to Dr. Margaret Paul's interview with 
