“How Can I Not Get Hurt By Others’ Judgments?”

Do you have an expectation that if you were emotionally healthy, you would not feel hurt in the face of others’ judgments or uncaring behavior?

This is not true! Let me explain.

When you are emotionally healthy, you are less likely to be devastated by others’ behaviors, because you have learned to not take them personally. But your heart can still feel loneliness and heartache in response to others’ unloving behavior.

It is very important to learn to lovingly manage these core painful feelings of the heart.

The feelings of loneliness and heartache have vital information for you about what is going on with another person. They tell you whether the other person is open or closed, loving or unloving. You need this information in order to make good decisions about how to take care of yourself around others. Continue reading “How Can I Not Get Hurt By Others’ Judgments?”

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The Fear of Being Duped

Is being duped something you avoid at all costs, or are you willing to be duped in order to keep your heart open?


No one likes being duped. It feels awful to realize that someone has pulled the wool over our eyes – that we were so naïve we didn’t see that we were being duped, lied to or taken advantage of.

However, since this painful experience happens to most of us at one time or another, we each have a choice – will we make protecting ourselves from being duped our highest priority, or will we make being open and loving more important than whether or not we get duped?

I have found in my work with clients that the fear of being duped or taken advantage of is often in the way of being loving to themselves and others. They are so afraid of being taken advantage of that they close their heart, keeping their walls up to protect themselves from the possibility of being duped. Continue reading The Fear of Being Duped

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Safety With an Open Heart

While you might believe that keeping your heart closed is the only way to feel safe, there is a far better way of feeling safe. . . . → Read More: Safety With an Open Heart