Relationship Challenges | Dr. Margaret Paul

Do You Make People Up?

By Margaret, on October 18th, 2014

Do you often see people as you want them to be rather than as they are? Has this caused you problems in your relationships?

“We don’t see things as they are, we see them as we are.” —Anais Nin

A variation on the above quote might be, “We don’t see people as they are – . . . → Read More: Do You Make People Up?

Addiction to Getting Others To Change

By Margaret, on March 25th, 2013

Are you focusing on getting your partner to change to avoid a painful choice that you might need to make?

If you find yourself often focused on healing others or hoping you can get others to change, it is likely that you don’t think of this as an addiction. I define an addiction . . . → Read More: Addiction to Getting Others To Change

Are You Demanding? Do You Hate Demands?

By Margaret, on April 14th, 2012

“If you ask something of someone and you are upset over their response, then it wasn’t a request, it was a demand.” – Michael E. Angier

Most of us hate being demanded of. We don’t like being put in the position of feeling we have to say ‘yes’ in order to not run into another’s upset with us. Sometimes, to delay the negative response, we might say ‘yes’ and then not do it, hoping that the anticipated anger will never come. We might even mean ‘yes’ in the moment we say it, but because most of us hate being controlled by another, we might unconsciously resist doing what the other person has asked us to do. Continue reading Are You Demanding? Do You Hate Demands?