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Have you wondered why you may be having a hard time connecting with others? “Intimacy begins with oneself. It does no good to try to find intimacy with friends, lovers, and family if you are starting out from alienation and division within yourself.” – Thomas Moore Do you try to create intimacy with your . . . → Read More: Intimacy With Others Starts From Within  Comments are closed  Relationships  atheist, connection, emotional connection, heartbreak, Inner Bonding, intimacy, loneliness, love, loving yourself, Margaret Paul, Relationships, self-abandonment, spiritual guidance, spirituality Do you get addictively stuck on the Internet and can’t seem to find your way out?
Our society provides many ways we can avoid our feelings addictively. Many people today are addicted to being on the Internet as one way of avoiding feeling an underlying pain that they believe they cannot manage feeling. Continue reading Are You Addicted to the Internet?
      Comments are closed Addictions Addictions, aloneness, emotional healing, emptiness, false beliefs, guilt, I feel empty, Inner Bonding, Internet addiction, Margaret Paul, painful feelings, self-abandonment, self-judgment Do you have the courage to hang in through the hard times and do the learning and healing we all need to do to create a loving relationship?
Are you committed to working through the difficult and painful issues that inevitably arise in relationships, or do you run when things get hard? If you want to have a long-term loving relationship, then you need to learn to hang in through the hard stuff.
When Isabel and Lloyd met, they both felt that this was the relationship they had each been looking for. They could talk for hours. They were each deeply interested in learning about and getting to know each other. The chemistry between them was incredible. They had both been through previous marriages and both felt they were ready for a loving relationship. They enjoyed reading the same books and they both seemed open to learning. Continue reading Relationships: Hanging in Through the Hard Stuff Do you sometimes have confusion regarding the value of a relationship?
Jeanine asked me the following question at one of my free webinars:
“Hi Dr. Paul, thank you so much for your wonderful work and for these complimentary calls. Dr. Paul, my parents divorced when I was 9 years old. I am 37 and single. Part of me resists serious commitment because I feel like, ‘What’s the point? It’s all impermanent anyway, so why even bother?’ I am afraid that after the honeymoon is over I will be taken for granted and trapped in a loveless relationship/marriage. Can you help? Thank you!” Continue reading “What’s The Point of a Relationship?” Most of us lead very busy lives and it is easy to become overwhelmed with all we need to do. In addition, about 15% to 20% of us are born with highly sensitive nervous systems that are far more reactive to having a lot to do than the general population. Since I have a very highly sensitive nervous system, I understand how easily some of us can become overwhelmed by the demands of life. I have learned some powerful tools for managing overwhelm that I will share with you as I answer the following questions about overwhelm. Leslie asked: “I feel overwhelmed when I have many things to do and they all seem equally important. How do I decide where to start without feeling that perhaps I need to be doing one of the other things instead?” Continue reading “How Can I Manage Overwhelm?” What’s really happening when someone blames and shames you? If you stopped taking it personally, what would you be feeling?
What do you generally do when someone blames you for his or her feelings? Do you find yourself taking it personally and blaming yourself? This is what Melinda struggles with:
“How do I take loving care of myself when my partner is acting out with jealousy that he is not acknowledging? I feel blamed and shamed. It somehow feels like there’s something wrong with me, or something I’m doing even though there isn’t. What do I do with the shame? How do I love myself through it? His reaction can last a few hours or even a few days.” Melinda, your partner’s blaming and shaming of you are his ways of avoiding responsibility for his own feelings. But the real question is, why are you taking on the blame and shame? Why are you taking his behavior personally? Continue reading “Why Do I Feel Shame When I’m Being Blamed?” |
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