What do you do when you feel helpless over another’s choices? What is the result? Are you happy with how you manage this feeling?
Helplessness is a very difficult feeling. It can even feel like life or death to those of us who were left to cry for hours as babies, with no one coming to help us. Because we were so helpless over ourselves as babies and small children, it can trigger feelings of panic. It’s hard to remember, in these moments when fear is triggered, that as adults, we are not helpless over ourselves.
For many of us, the deep fear that got programmed into us as young children can trigger our wounded self’s desire to control, when we feel helpless over another’s choices.
“Security is mostly superstition. It does not exist in nature, nor do the children of men as a whole experience it. Avoiding danger is no safer in the long run than outright exposure. Life is either a daring adventure, or nothing. To keep our faces toward change and behave like free spirits in the presence of fate is strength undefeatable.” ~ Helen Keller
Many parents try to be far better parents than their parents were, yet their children grow up feeling lost and empty. Discover why in this article.
There was an interesting article in The Atlantic, entitled “How to Land Your Kid in Therapy: Why the obsession with our kids’ happiness may be dooming them to unhappy adulthoods. A therapist and mother reports.”
The article is about the way many parents focus much of their energy on being there for their children, but their children end up feeling lost and empty. Continue reading A Problem with Today’s Parenting
If you are addicted to seeking others’ approval, this article is for you!
Many years ago, I became aware of feeling anxious much of the time. Since this feeling had been with me as long as I could remember, it had seemed normal – until it stopped being okay with me. It stopped being okay when I went back to school to become a psychotherapist. I realized then that, normal or not, I didn’t want to continue to live my life with this anxiety.
However, I had felt this way for so long that I had no idea why I was anxious. So every time I was aware of the anxiety – which happened most often when I was around people – I started to notice my thoughts and actions.
The first thing I noticed was how much I was judging myself around others. I was constantly putting pressure on myself to say the right thing and do the right thing. Why? I believed that if I said and did the right things, I could have control over getting others’ approval. Continue reading Why Do We Seek Approval?
The news stories of sexual addiction lead us to ask “Why?”
One of the sad truths in our society is how empty many people feel, and the devastation their emptiness causes others through their resulting addictive behavior.
We have all heard about the sexual acting-out of Anthony Weiner, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Tiger Woods, Bill Clinton and John Edwards. We all know about the many famous people who end up in treatment centers for alcohol and drug addiction.
The question is: why? Why would someone who seemingly has everything destroy their own life, and the lives of those they are close to, with their addictions to sex, alcohol or drugs?
It’s true that these high-profile people seem to have everything that our society deems important for happiness and self-esteem – money and all that money can buy, relationships and fame. What is it that creates the desperate need to act out addictively when they have so much? Continue reading The Devastation of Inner Emptiness
Are you manifesting your dreams? Are your dreams big enough? Watching this 1 minute movie will remind you of HOW to manifest your dreams!
Margaret Paul, Ph.D. is a best-selling author of 8 books, relationship expert, and co-creator of the powerful Inner Bonding® process – featured on Oprah, and recommended by actress . . . → Read More: Inspirational Video – Dream Big!
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