Explaining | Dr. Margaret Paul

The Challenge of Not Being Reactive

By Margaret, on June 15th, 2020

By Dr. Margaret Paul June 15, 2020

How do you generally react when another is being unloving? How do you wish you could respond? “When Eddie blames me, I react so fast, before I have a chance to get my loving adult onboard. I’m explaining and defending before I can even take a . . . → Read More: The Challenge of Not Being Reactive

The Myth of Explaining and Defending

By Margaret, on May 6th, 2011

“What’s the matter with you?”
“How could you do that?”
“Explain yourself, young lady/young man.”
“Why are you dressed like that?”
“Why are you late again?”
“What did you do to your hair!”

How often did you hear some variation of this when you were growing up? I heard it all the time. And what I learned to do was to desperately defend and explain in fruitless attempts to get my mom or dad to stop judging me and SEE me. Or I would apologize and become the “good girl,” so they would approve of me. Continue reading The Myth of Explaining and Defending